Breaking Out
by Shadowkissed25
Summary: Maximum Ride runs away from her abusive, alcoholic father to live with her brother Ari but even she knows better then to belive her past is gone for good. Will she ever truly escape? Will she decide to finally be happy with her brother and his rag tag band? Or is she to tangled in the drama that follows her every move but who can help her and erase the damage that has been done?
1. Chapter 1

This was the last time I told myself over and over I can finally leave my abusive, alcoholic, useless father for good.

I grabbed my tatter dark blue backpack and yanked open the top zipper I grabbed what few pair of clothes I owned and shoved them into my bag along with my hairbrush, my Ipod that I got as a hand me down from a ex-friend I had years ago and my way to often necessary concealer.

I slipped on my worn out converse sneakers and for the first time during my packing I tried to actually be silent I slid open my window with a long high pitched screech trying to announce my plans for escape I curled my fingers gently around the screen and with one swift motion I popped it out of place and pulled into into my room with a thin layer of dust it brought with it lingered in the light of the doorway to my salvation.

I put one foot outside of the window and looked down at the two story jump, sure it might hurt a bit but I would be out of here for good my older brother Ari finally got his own place and said anytime I wanted I could come live with him because he knew that daddy hit me he had been there for many years of our back and forth daily fights but at 14 he left and never came back but he made sure to stay in contact and now he was 18 and had his own house.

I mean sure it might not be a huge mansion with my own bathroom but I had thought about just living out of a cardboard box many times so I had no problem just leaving this life behind for good, but I even knew in the back of my mind that it was naive to think that, I was only 16 I had to hope Ari could take care of me for 2 more years and he's not known for being consistent or planning ahead but it was better then what I had here.

I picked up my second foot to swing it out the window then I was plunged backwards by a forceful hand dragging me back into the hell I was trying so desperately to escape.

"Let me go you ugly bastard!" I screamed flailing wildly trying to grab anything we passed by to get me out of his malicious grasp that I knew would only cause pain.

He stood at the top of the stairs and held me up into a standing position "Pathetic" he spit out in disdain and punched me right in my eye as I was launched backwards down the stairs my backpack still in my grasp I land on the bottom step with a thud I feel my leg bend awkwardly behind me but I don't feel a snap so there has been some mercy so far I look up slowly at the top of the stairs I see my father Jeb swaying as he puts the beer bottle he was dangling loosely in his left hand to his parched lips he takes a big gulp but he does not look refreshed but more dehydrated then before.

I struggled to my feet and stumbling to get my footing with my ankle feeling like it was bashed in with a heavy rock but I fought through it and sprinted to the front door half dragging my sore foot behind me I ripped the door open as he reached the bottom stair I ran out into the blessed daylight where not even he dare to touch me but I kept running letting my dirty blonde hair whip behind me every step my converse hit the ground it upturned a little cloud of dry dust to leave behind me along with all my suffering, this was me turning my new leaf.

I had no problem walking, in fact I preferred it but Ari lived on the other side of town which wasn't a huge town but definitely not small and with my messed up ankle exploding in flames every step I took the sun was starting to set and the temperature was dropping dramatically but I just kept limping watching my breath come out in little puffs of smoke and drift upward to disappear drifting into the heavens above.

The moon was high in the sky if I had to guess I would say it was about 11 p.m. before I started to see his house come into view all lights on and music loud I shook my head slowly but chuckled at least their neighbors weren't super close to them I was finally standing on his front porch I rang the door bell and waited and waited ... and waited, now I don't know about you but i'm not known for my patience, so I let myself in.

It wasn't much to look at but it was homey, there were an awful lot of shoes laying around well he must have company that explains the loud music I heard blaring through the walls it sounded like the source was the basement so I helped myself to the kitchen, I would say hello later i'm not good with people anyway I rummaged through the fridge and found enough materials to make a bomb ass sandwich so as I was inhaling my second one still standing in the fridge door way letting the pale yellow light cascade over the white walls allowing shadows to dance playfully in the dark.

As I finished demolishing my sandwich I licked my fingers greedy for liquid I turned to the sink leaving the fridge open to light my way I didn't want to turn on more lights, I didn't know what his electric bill already was I turned on the water and dove my head under the faucet to take in gulps like a savage who didn't know how to use a proper cup.

"You know there's cups right?" came a deep voice from the shadows I didn't recognize I turned to fast I fell on my butt and looked up agitated and crabby from how long my day has already been so excuse me if I wasn't exactly polite to the talking shadow "Yeah, just felt like getting it straight from the source there a problem with that?" I snapped then the light turned on and I saw it was a man about my age dressed in all black as his raven colored hair dropped in front of his deep, deep brown eyes.

"You always so polite after you break into someones house and raid their kitchen?" he asked while raising an eyebrow and putting his hands on his hips he looked down at me but I could see little gold flecks in his eyes dancing playfully almost excited for the banter.

"Hey Fang you find out what that noise you heard was?" now that voice I recognized, Ari stepped into the kitchen he saw me and he turned shocked then it became pissed "What the Fuck Fang?" Ari shoved Fang hard but Fang just raised an eyebrow in response then I realized how this looked I was on the floor still with what i'm amusing is now a shiny black eye and a messed up ankle with this Fang fellow over me .

I scramble to my feet and limp between Ari and Fang I wrapped my arms around Ari in a bone crushing huge and whispered "It wasn't him, I just got here and he walked in so I got startled and fell." I felt Ari slowly relax his muscles and looked down at me since I stood about 2 feet shorter then him he let a smile creep across his face then he tousled my hair, like I hate, and looked up to Fang "Hey man i'm really sorry about that, this here is my lil sis Max."

He just nodded his hello to me I flicked my wrist in a short wave above my head as a response "Well come meet the rest of the band!" he shouted excitedly "Psshh you're in a band?!" he winked at me and grabbed my hand pulling me towards the basement door they both came out of I followed behind but my limp was getting worse so I slowed us down but he knew better then to ask about it.

As I came into view at the bottom of the stairs it became quite then a short mocha colored girl bounced up to me and grabbed my hand shaking it up and down excitedly "Hi i'm Nudge I play the violin in the band, I mean I know its not a common instrument but I really am good I promise. I think it's just what this band needs though to stand out I mean think about it, there can only be so many guitar players and drummers but violin in a rock band I mean come on, it screams individuality and notice us, right?"

I looked at her trying to process if she wanted me to answer or if she just wanted to be told she was contributing. "Umm yeah I think it's great." I smoothly recovered, her smile beamed at me indicating my answer was satisfactory "Well you've meet Nudge" Ari said with a nervous laugh rubbing the back of his head "Yeah she's a real chatter box, but an excellent addition to the band, now for the rest!" he exclaimed excitedly sweeping a wide arm out motioning to several more rag tag members in front of him who he started to group up gawking at me like I was an animal on display it made my skin crawl with the sudden attention.

"Well this here is Iggy our pianist." Iggy waved at me "delicate fingers." he said wiggling his fingers like he was playing an imaginary piano in the air in front of him. His blonde hair hung straight down in front of his pale blue eyes, he was rather tall about a foot taller then me. "This is Angel our back up singer." She looked the youngest but not by much she smiled shyly at me I couldn't help but to smile back she had long bright blonde hair down to the bottom of her back in graceful waves.

"This is Gazzy our drummer." Gazzy crossed his arms in front of him and gave me a head nod as if to say'whats up' his hair was the same color as Angel but his hair was buzzed short around the edges and longer in the front. "You've met Fang our guitar player." I saw Mr. tall and dark walk over and lean against a wall nonchalantly a little ways away from everybody. "And then we have our lead singer Lissa." I singled her out by the fact she was the last one there but she didn't greet me or wave to indicate who she was, I could tell we were gonna just be the best of friends. (Insert eye roll here)

"And last but not least me, I play a little back up guitar and sing the male lead." I had no clue Ari could sing but it has been years since I have seen him, if I missed him I normally just called when Jeb went to work but I haven't seen him in person since he left home.

"Nice to meet you all I'm Max, just Max. So I was curious if I could crash here for a bit big bro I could just take the couch upstairs." "Of course you can stay but there's a room you can stay in that beats that old couch by a mile follow me." Ari turns away from his band and walk me upstairs again and down a long off white hallway, this needs a homey touch there's no pictures or anything to say who lives here as we got to the end of the hallway there was three doors we passed the first one that Ari pointed out was the bathroom and the one at the very end was his bedroom but the one in the middle was to be mine for now.

"Ok this is it I know its not much but its comfy I promise, I actually have this room in case any of my band mates need a place for a bit we all kinda have rough home lives that's why we all get along so well, so I hope you open up to them and trust them like I do." he smiled warmly at me "It's nice to see you again Max, I'll take care of you now I promise, life will be better." I felt myself actually wanting more then anything to believe his words, only time can tell I smiled back and he closed the door and left.

I looked around my new room, it was cozy there was one small dresser, a mattress on the ground and a door that opened to a cramped closet but it's not like I had things to put in there anyway. I looked longingly at the bed and decided to just hit the hay for now I'll unpack and get to know them tomorrow I laid down and he was right it was comfortable but a muggy smell clung to the fabric, I was gonna have to fix that tomorrow I thought as I drifted off to sleep hoping to have peaceful dreams now that I was safe.

 **Ari POV**

I walked back down to my mates happier then I've been in a long time I finally get my baby sister to be with me and safe, away from the hell's of that home, I felt guilty for leaving her when we were young but that was in the past I can fix it now, make it up to her.

"So what was with her face?" snarled Lissa wasting no time on being her super optimistic self, but she was my girlfriend as well as a necessary member of our group so we all knew how to tolerate her "You guys remember I told you briefly about how my home was an abusive hell?" I asked gazing over all of them still bunched up together waiting for answers on my new guest "Well that's my baby sis and she just got out of there today so I'm gonna assume she might be skittish at first but she'll warm up to you guys soon enough."

"OMG do you think she will want to join the band? Can she play an instrument?" Nudge pried "Or sing?" Fang suggested glaring at Lissa "She use to play keyboard actually I can ask her tomorrow it would be a great way to make her feel welcome but for now just be nothing but nice to her, I swear to God if I hear of you guys hurting her you'r out got it?" I asked sending them my protective older brother glare daring them to oppose me but they all just smiled or shrugged and went back to tuning their instruments or in Lissa's case looking at her nails.

 **Disclaimer**


	2. Chapter 2

The light was blinding in my room causing me to wake up unnaturally early, for me at least, I looked around trying to locate a clock but I couldn't find any.

Groaning loudly I heaved myself out of bed and shoved my fist in my eye to rub out any access sleep I stumbled out into the hallway I tried to navigate my way in the unfamiliar surroundings.

I find it and dig through six different cabinets trying to locate some kind of coffee to please morning me, I find what i'm looking for as the intoxicating smell fills the house I look at the clock on the stove and see it's 10 am uggggg.

It's Sunday so tomorrow I'll have to figure out how to get to school now since I didn't know where the bus pick up spot was around this side of town I raised my cup of steaming goodness to my awaiting lips taking in a big gulp letting it scald my throat but keeping an impassive face a small groan found it's was past my lips in pleasure.

I finished up my cup and rinsed out the cup putting it back in its spot I didn't want to be a huge burden just yet looking around I saw just how uncleanly my brother lives a true bachelor on his own, laundry was everywhere and dishes were piling up but looking at the trash I saw he already went to the option of paper plates.

I decided to give him some incentive to keep me I went to my room and found a black bandanna with white print I twirled it into a long rope and tied up my hair letting my long wavy curls hang out of the back I tied the bandanna around my head circling my curls in a black halo, how appropriate I smiled I put on long jeans and a baggy sweater like always i just pulled up the sleeves to my elbows allowing a few scars to peak out around the edges but not pushing it to far just yet.

I started floating around the house picking up a sock here, a piece of trash there. When the laundry was all in the washer I didn't bother with sorting it he had no white shirts to bleed into so I wasn't worried I started on dishes. Time was flying by and Ari still hadn't woken up I wonder how late he normally stayed up or if I should wake him up to go to a job or something I finished dishes and decided to do the finishing touches with sweeping and vacuuming as I finished, I noticed everything was perfect except for the bathroom and bedrooms.

I went to the bathroom next and started where I am used to at home and went straight to lift up the toilet seat lid and I started gagging "No no no no I will not degrade myself so far as to sit on that, how in the hell is that even sanitary?!" I was ranting to myself I wanted to put it down and pretend I never saw it but I knew it would be all I would think about next time I had to use the bathroom with a defeated sigh I searched his drawers for lots of gloves and some kind of sanitary wipes.

I found everything I needed and got to work, I put real elbow grease into my work and was actually exhausted when I was done and I decided that was enough free labor for the next week minimum.

I started to explore the basement, I wanted to see where the real magic happened, it smelt like body odor and old pizza, I guess i'm not done, I scrubbed corners and opened windows as a final touch I light half burned candles I found holding up other random items around the house, at least he owned some.

"Well don't you look like the perfect trophy wife?" came a deep voice from the stairs coming down to the basement. I turned trying to not show I almost had a heart attack because I didn't hear him coming.

"It's called standards, can't believe he lives like this." Fang let out a deep chuckle walking into better view "It definitely looks better around here, he just might keep you." "That's hopefully the plan." I whisper I don't know just how much they know about the predicament i'm in or my home life.

"He wouldn't leave you on the streets even if you had shitty cleaning skills." I think it was his attempt to lighten the mood but I just stared dead eyed out the window wondering what I would do if he ever did kick me out, I had no plan B.

"He has a soft spot for charity cases, that's how he came to find all of us one by one. Plus I mean you're his sister so I mean, that's a no brainer." I looked up at him and forced a smirk to show him I appreciated it but it didn't reach my eyes because I didn't really believe that, sure he's family but I'v seen how much even family can hurt you.

All those years ago he left, he turned 14 and just left I screamed out for him to come back I begged and pleaded but he was gone my brother the only other person who had to suffer through the hells of that home with me just left me behind, I understood why it just still hurt.

"OMG did you guys just hear how much Fang just talked? That's like a new record, was anyone recording? I feel like a mother with her child's first words OMG ok now I'm ready say it again!" Nudge came plowing down the stairs almost plowing over Fang but he just leaned against the wall almost blending into the dark background.

I heard a lot more voices and foot steps upstairs and finally my brother who decided to grace us with his presence he stumbled down the stairs talking under his breath to himself when his eyes passed over he he rubbed the back of his head then he froze and looked right back at me "Wait did you do this? I thought we got robbed! Wheres all my stuff?"

"Put away where it belongs?" I snapped at him turning on my emergency mom voice "Do you think you can just live like a slob the rest of your life? That some female will just walk after you picking up your dirty laundry and trash?" I was walking towards him getting louder and louder pointing a finger at his chest and even though he was 2 feet taller than me he was backing into a corner every time I jabbed my finger into his chest.

"AND do you KNOW what under your toilet seat even LOOKED like?! ARE you an ANIMAL?!" he was all the way in the corner flinching away from me and stuttering trying to think of a response "I well .. I-I-I mean .. I that is" "No more excuses mister I demand results!" I roared then stomped up the stairs with finality leaving with the flair I desired.

"Damn dude" whispered Gazzy "You just got so whipped" whispered Iggy "She doesn't have to be so damn bossy, it's not here house babe you should have told her off!" Lissa said at a normal tone not caring if I heard I held my breath listening for his response maybe I went to far, I didn't really mind the mess I just wanted to be accepted and appreciated ... I'm sorry.

"Do you see this house?" spoke up Fang "She deserves a thank you not to be told off." the room went silent and a slow smile spread across my face, I think I may have made a friend, I mean not like a best friend that knows my most inner deepest secrets but a friend none the less.

"Oh shit I forgot HEY MAX come down here I had a question for you!" I waiting a couple seconds to act like I had walked away and wasn't just eavesdropping I waited then much more gracefully I descended the stairs "You called?" I lazily asked acting like I wasn't panicking he was mad at me for snapping at him in front of his friends.

"You still play the keyboard? Maybe you would like to fill in here and there just playing when you want to? Oh and thanks for the house." he added a blush at the end with his thank you I nodded a your welcome and smirked but then I felt a giant rock drop in my stomach as I hoped he wouldn't push the keyboard.

"Thanks but no thanks Ari."

"You don't play anymore? You were so good!"

"Haven't played recently." I was trying to evade his questions swatting them away trying to pretend they were nothing.

"It's like riding a bike come on just show my mates what you got, maybe your not even good enough for us." he joked with a wink trying to play but I was not in the playing mood.

"No Ari"

Oh come on Maxie just one so.."

"I SAID NO!" I screamed my fist were clenched so hard that my nails were digging into my skin making blood pool in my palms but I didn't feel it, my whole body had a slight tremor to it shaking like I was cold, except I wasn't I was terrified.

"I-I'm sorry Ari but p-p-please drop it. N-n-no keyboard. P-p-please." I refused to look at him as I felt my hands over flow spilling over with my hidden pain as my hand stayed clenched refilling my steady stream of blood trickling down onto the stairs I turned shaking harder and harder I slowly made my way upstairs feeling the eyes on my back and needing to get away

Just get away make it stop, make it stop, make it stop my mind was chanting over and over getting louder pleading with me to do what was necessary I walked to the bathroom and took a shaving razor. Taking the head I smashed it against the counter top pealing away the plastic between the blades I removed one and steadily breathed out then in, then out, then breathing back in I pulled up my pants leg I pressed the cold metal against my upper thigh pulling the metal slowly across my skin I saw my blood pool along my newest scar.

I knew how to hide my scars ever though it got hard sometimes to differentiate between the self inflicted scars and the battle scars it was easier to hide people only check wrists like i don't have an entire open body canvas of skin to pick from. Like my pain can only exist if it is easy to spot and checking anywhere else would be more effort then they would be willing to invest.

It glistened beautifully against the awful yellow light that flooded this bathroom I felt me press the blade to my skin two more times before I felt the mental voices stop screaming at me, their demands had been met and they were silenced for one more day.

I fell to the floor shaking more from blood loss then fear but that I could handle, as my demons were put to rest once more accepting there sacrifice of my flesh for the peace of my mind. I thought back to the last time I played the keyboard and I squeezed my eyes shut trying to forget the pain that came with that night I felt my breathing pick up in speed again but one more line next to my other three calmed me back down, great now I need to clean again but at least this was my mess.

 **Disclaimer**


	3. Chapter 3

I cleaned up my mess and moped around in my room to ashamed to face anyone knowing that they have known me for what not even one whole day and I blew up at them completely destroying any chances I had at making any of them decent acquaintances much less friend.

As I sat on my mattress feeling sorry for myself there was a soft knock on the door I forced myself to sit up straight but try and look cool and relaxed like I didn't care what they thought even though it was consuming my every thought.

"Yeah?" I called out nonchalantly blonde curls slowly appeared around my barely open door then slowly just a section of Angles delicate face progressed to appear she shyly smiled trying to hide behind a curtain of her hair "Hey Max can I come in please?" my heart melted and a goofy grin crawled across my face.

"Of course you can sweetie." I replied cheerfully "Whats up?" she shuffled over to my bed and sat on the very edge farthest away from me "I ummm I wanted to try and umm well I guess try and get a better understanding of each other." she was fiddling nervously with her sleeves staring intently at her fingers her face was growing red and it was kind of adorable how uncomfortable she was I couldn't help it I reached out and pulled her into my chest for a hug I tucked her head under my chin and wrapped my arms around her back she went stiff as a board but didn't resist.

"I would love that, more then anything." I breath out the last part in relief that I haven't blown my chance for a friend just yet, there was still a glimmer of hope but it was there none the less.

She significantly relaxed breathing out a long sigh she nuzzled into me into a more comfortable hug until she was sitting in my lap completely letting me stroke her hair untangling little knots I found as I went.

"Well I was hoping maybe if someone opened up to you first you just might talk to us more and let us get to know you, and what your triggers are, and what not to say and stuff." I giggled "That might take a while sweetie I have a lot of those." I added sadly "But I would love to try."

I looked down into her deep blue eyes as she smiled letting it light up her whole face "Ok" she said enthusiastically "Well to put it generally my older brother takes care of me and Gazzy, he has for about one year now. He struggles but never shows it he always keeps a roof above our heads even if it isn't home and makes sure we can eat at least once a day even if he has to skip a meal." I looked down at her shocked she told me that much but she wasn't quite finished.

"We ran away from home because mommy and daddy hated us, they would tell us all the time and then hit us really hard but luckily we had our big brother to love us and take care of us."

"I'm sorry you had to live through that, you're brother must be pretty great guy huh?" I asked just trying to cheer her up again "Well you know him silly, it's Fang." I froze not knowing what to say, here I was complaining about my life and even though Ari told me they all had it rough I never thought of their stories God I'm so selfish.

She smiles up at me "It felt good to get that out and don't worry everyone understands your freak out, we all have triggers. It was just surprising to us because we all know how to talk to each other but well your new." she looked nervous again "So do you trust me enough now to tell me why you don't play the keyboard anymore?"

"Angel it's not that I don't trust you I just don't want you to have that image in your head, you deserve happy thoughts not my nightmares." her face grew dark and unfocused but determined "For my tenth birthday I had a hot iron placed on my back just for fun, I haven't let anyone touch my back since. Right now though I'm letting you touch it and I really hope its not for nothing."

I was at a loss for words I couldn't let her down but I didn't know how to make this story less graphic there was no blunt way to say it and still feel like I didn't just damage this little girl who's been through enough but then I realized she told me her story so I could realize she doesn't want to be treated like a little girl because she isn't one.

Well mentally anyway, she has seen and felt things most adults won't ever experience but now people like me still talk to her like she doesn't understand the pain, like she hasn't felt the terror of your parent being your worst enemy I took a deep breath and looked right at her I put up all my mental walls so she wouldn't see that this day still terrifies me.

"My dad has beaten me all my life my mom died from giving birth to me and he blamed me everyday. One day wandered into the attic I found tons of her old stuff well going through it I felt like I could understand her better this woman who I know nothing about but brought me into this world. I found an old keyboard and a couple of old VCR's of her playing I taught myself by watching her videos over and over with a clunky box style TV that was also stuck up there with her stuff. One day my dad went to a friends house with me to pay his rent for the month and they had a grand piano I felt a pull towards that piano how all the keys glistened because of how clean they were. So I started to play."

I paused to collect myself and breath I hadn't told a sole about this not even my brother knew but she shared her pain so it was only fair "My dad went to have a few drinks in the kitchen with his friend well eventually his friend passed out when my dad came to look for me, he found me playing that damned piano. He was so drunk and just so .. angry that he started calling me Velencia, my mothers name telling me I will never be any good and to never assume I could do something worth while ever again, that I was a worthless piece of shit that would do the world a favor if I could never play again. He took my fingers one by one a broke them with the lid of the piano, he smashed them individually until they couldn't even move. I begged and cried and pleaded to my father but by the seventh finger I passed out from pain, he never stopped."

I finished my story and looked straight ahead of me making sure my mental blocks were still in place. Until i felt little hands wrap around my back hugging me like I had her I heard a sniffle "Thank you for trusting me with your story." I just continued stroking her hair almost rhythmically to comfort myself more then her to tell myself that maybe it was ok to let myself open up I kept thinking about that day but not once did my itch to cut pop up, no demons I had to wrestle, no mental fires I had to extinguish with my blood.

I heard the door creak open and saw Fangs head peak in and he jerked to a stop not taking his eyes off Angels small body wrapped around mine. His eyes got large but that was the only emotion he showed "Angel?" he whispered she turned her head to look at him and smiled wiping tears off her face "We were just swapping stories." she told Fang sadly she then looked back at me "Is it ok if I tell my brothers or do you want me to keep it a secret?" I smiled at her I hated the idea of everyone knowing but I hated even more the idea of her carrying around my secret unable to let anyone else in on a secret that wasn't hers to carry.

"Later on yeah you can sweetie." I kissed her forehead and reluctantly gently nudged her off she got off and shuffled quietly out of the room, I wonder where she gets that from? I snicker at my own thoughts Fang raises an eyebrow at me "How did you do that?" he asks pushing his face to become impassive again "Do what?" I ask tilting my head slightly to the right in confusion "She doesn't let anyone touch her much less hug her, and I mean anyone." "Well guess she just made a break through." I said refusing to give anything away about our secret heart to heart we had even though I knew by tomorrow he would know, but later was better. This might be the last time he looked at me normal better enjoy it while it lasts.

"Some break through" he whispered "Oh I was suppose to ask if you want to see where Ari works?"

"It's like 11pm where the hell is it?"

"I promise you'll like it." he winked at me as he ducked back out of my room "We leave in two." he shouted over his shoulder before he completely was out of ear shot.

I scrambled to my feet checking how I looked in the bathroom mirror, not that it mattered and ran down the hall to find the whole gang waiting for me I dropped my eyes not wanting to see the rejection but Angel ran up to me and grabbed my hand hugging it to her chest "Come on!" she giggled pulling me past the others out the front door I looked back to see everyone with wide eyes and jaws hanging open staring at Angel "Well we goin or not?" I pushed they all seemed to remember we had places to be and started moving again. "Since when does she touch people?" I heard Gazzy whisper but Fang just chuckled.

We walked until we reached downtown where all the 'bad influences' hung out after dark but I didn't say anything just stuck with the group who hushed their gossip to quite mumbles terrified if their voices would be considered hostile or offensive to a stranger passing by who might consider it necessary to take action and teach us a lesson but I was use to this atmosphere in my own home so I walked by with my head high making eye contact with anyone who looked at me refusing to put my head down and surrender.

We arrived at a truck garage and a intimidating muscular 6'5" white man in a tight black T-shirt crossed his arms in front of his chest until we got closer then he nodded at us "Sup guys." Ari nodded back at him and the group kept walking in I was unsure what to do so I kept following. We went down a dark concrete hallway turning two times until we came to a room bursting with people I would say there was roughly 250 in there, there was no room to sit but people were standing on rough crevices they found along the wall and ledges ten feet off the ground all staring at a large circle in the center of the room where I saw two people going full at it trying to bust each others face in, street fighting.

My adrenaline started pumping I could hear my heart beating threatening to bust through my chest ... and I loved it, they weren't beating each other senselessly it was a competition for who was the best. I followed the group as they went to talk to a man who was standing right at the edge of the circle watching the fight intently he saw us and his hand shot up "Ari my man hows it been?" he grabed Ari's arm and pulled him in and clapped him once on the back in a 'bro hug' "Been good man, got any fights for me? I got bills to pay." "Yeah don't we all." chuckled the man I'm gonna call the ring leader he has brown greasy hair slicked back under a fedora hat he wore a white tank top under a open button up shirt.

"Yeah I can get you a fight you wanna skate by tonight and make some easy money or you lookin for some big bucks?" Ari looked back at me "Naw man my lil sis is here I can't look to banged up I'll take one of the noobs for ya." ring leader nodded then walked over to me he started to circle me I didn't like how his eyes felt on me he reached up and took a toothpick out of his mouth that went unnoticed before "Hey honey you wanna fight?" "Call me honey again and I just might have to." I snapped back not taking my eyes off him he let out a loud bark laugh "BAHAHA I like you, you want to fight in the ring tonight though, make some cash?" before I could respond Ari jumped in "Shes just here to watch Sam." I glared at him and looked back at Sam "How much do I get if I fight?"

"I get ten percent of the earning and how much you make depends on how much the crowd likes you." he swept out an arm to make his point as the people went insane screaming on the fight in front of them "If you make it interesting or show you can put up an actual fight they will make higher bets on you, if you show off some scars showing you've been in a fight or two or if you've made a name for yourself in fighting but I'm gonna assume your new." I looked at Ari one more time then back at Sam "I wanna fight." "Max no you do .." "I'm not asking permission I want in the ring." I glared at Ari daring him to try and push me but he backed down sighing heavily in defeat "Awesome what name should I call you?" I smiled at him for the first time accepting he may not be a completely bad guy "Maximum" he smiled back "I look forward to seeing you in the ring Max." I nodded in response and looked back at the rest of my group.

"ZOMG please tell me you kick some serious butt or you'll get pummeled out there like no joke these guys are serious Max." Nudge kept ranting but I zoned her out I heard another round of cheers bombard the room echoing off the walls then I heard a voice over an intercom and looked in the center of the ring there I saw Sam with a microphone that dangled by a wire right in the middle of the ring "Next up we have an all time fan favorite a scrapper till the end The Reaper!" Ari walked to the middle of the ring throwing his fists into the air he looked so happy with the crowd belting his name over and over I snickered "The Reaper?" "He actually has quite the name for himself, people bet on him instantly." replied iggy coolly "Oh" I replied dumbly he got knocked around a bit but it looked almost simple for him the way he moved way so graceful he looked at home in there, I really hope I looked like that.

Oh God what if everyone laughs at me and I get my ass pummeled into dust, jitters were starting to get to me I was anxious but then I remembered how many poundings I had to take from Jeb and he was trained in the military, I fought back but never won, he was always just .. better. I always fought back though never quiting I learned from his moves from his technique the only flaw was he was drunk so it was always changing always clumsily swinging but with the training it came at me with precision every time. I tried to focus on that and use it to my advantage, consider it my own training, for this moment in the ring and if there were gonna be more fights after.

Through my thoughts I heard "Next we have a newby the sister of the legend The Reaper we have Maximum!" I stepped into the ring "You ever fought before Maximum?" Sam boomed over the mic getting everyone's attention a steady hush filled the crowd then I remembered what Sam said about bidding high on people with scars or if you could please the crowd, I decided to do both I looked at Sam and decided that it was time to open up about pieces of my past and the first step was to show them just what they wanted, my scars. I slowly pulled the bottom of my sweater up I pulled it over my head and threw it to the side I was standing there in just my jeans and black lacy bra on, it was one of two that I owned but I was happy I wore this one today I looked down at my skin that looked like the knife version of a cat scratching post. There was a different story for every scar that marred every inch of my skin that was bared to the public, and I had a lot of stories.

I walked towards the mic and spoke up "A couple." the crowd roared with approval if I didn't please them with the scars I was also half naked it was a win win for them I dared a glance over at my group and for the most part they just looked ... sad. I locked eyes with Fang who mouthed silently "Go get em" I nodded solemnly and cast a glance to Ari who was pinching the bridge of his nose mumbling but when he looked up he blinked several times and I could of swore his eyes looked glossed over as if he was holding back tears then my attention was pulled back to the ring as they called out another name but I didn't catch it a built female with hoop earrings and a tube top walked into the ring and I zoned everything else out zeroing in on just her I watched her movements and studied the way she walked and carried herself hoping it would help me I heard the bell ring and she lazily walked up to me and open palm slapped me across the face, I saw it coming but didn't try to stop her, was this a joke.

I looked her right in the eyes and sneered "Bitch Please!" and used all my strength to punch straight in front of me, right in her throat she dropped like a bag of bricks I grabbed her hair and yanked her head backwards to show everyone my prey with my other hand I grabbed the mic "Is this all you have?!" it was felt like a wall of volume and cheers slammed into me as every voice in that room was screaming my name "I was promised a fight!" the cheers got louder "GIVE ME A FIGHT!" I released her hair and raised my clenched fist into the air "MAXIMUM MAXIMUM MAXIMUM" Sam walked towards the mic scrambling to get the crowd to calm down but they refused "MAXIMUM MAXIMUM" "OK OK I get it I call on The Punisher!" what is it with the stage names, maybe I should have picked a better one. A hush swept over the crowd as a tall man twice my size walked into the ring I heard Ari try to be heard over the crowd "No it's still her first time, he's to much wait, she's not ready!" I blocked him out and once again focused on just us in this ring.

"Come her you lil Bitch!" he lunged forward swinging with his full body weight he aimed his fist right for the left side of my face but I side stepped it just quick enough I felt the breeze pass by just an inch away reminding me just how close that was and I used my full force to retaliate and swung right for his jaw, difference was I hit my mark he stumbled and held his jaw rotating it making sure it was still intact, satisfied everything was still functioning he spit a mouthful of blood on the floor "Good hit, won't happen again." "Sure about that?" I asking putting on my angelic voice feigning innocence. He roared flailing forward for a moment I saw Jeb and stumbled, my mistake. He landed a blow to my ribs and had another blow immediately follow hitting my chest I landed on the ground with a thud causing a cloud of dust to billow around me I saw his foot coming straight for me I rolled just in time, he was quick.

I couldn't win in a battle of strength, it just wasn't possible with this brute but damn was I gonna try anyway, I sent a round house kick to his chest catching him off guard he stumbled backwards but was running at me again looking barely fazed I scanned my surroundings then I spotted a man bending over tying his shoe, this jerk was missing the fight but he presented me with a window, a small window but a window of opportunity none the less. Not thinking twice about it I ran towards the guy crouched down hearing my opponents footsteps right behind me, here's my last chance at winning this I thought as I planted my foot on the strangers shoulder I jumped up as high as I could I turned my body in midair and letting out an animistic roar I put my full body weight into my one punch aimed right at his nose.

I registered the shock on his face before feeling the crunch of his nose under my fist he dropped to the ground bleeding profusely from his now open wound Sam rushed to him when he didn't get up I was breathing heavily but refused to look weak and lean on anything until I found out if the fight was over or not. Sam touched his neck for a couple seconds then grabbed the mic "He's out cold Maximum wins!" The room explodes with my name once again and Sam hands me a wad of cash rolled up with a rubber band around it "I better see you here again." yelled Sam to be heard over the crowd without the mic my group found me and somehow led me out of the building without getting trampled.

When the cold night air hit my face I felt so much better and more refreshed like a cold shower as soon as you wake up "Damn Max you were so great in there I didn't think you were gonna try and take my job from me though." joked Ari good heartedly "And now watch as I slowly win over your friends." I whisper evilly rubbing my hands together "I have this money and really need to get some new things." I droned on not even trying until a high pitched squeal rang out through the air earning us several rude looks but now we just ignored them "SHOPPING!"

 **Disclaimer**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**

My alarm screamed at me so violently I thought I was being screamed at by one of those obnoxious screaming goats, I picked it up and threw it as hard as I could muster against the wall opposite my bed.

I smirked as I heard the noise stop and I rolled over in bed snuggling against my pillow grasping for the pieces of my dream that were still fresh in my head but fading the longer I couldn't fall back to sleep then suddenly the demon alarm sprung back to life screaming with even more intensity then before.

My blood shot eyes popped open with a vengeance I catapulted from my bed lunging for the alarm my knees landed on either side of my prey I pried at the corners trying to get straight to the source I roared using all my early morning rage as the alarm refused to budge.

My door creaked as it opened letting in that same yellow light that condemned this house as it streaked across my floor it reached me and basked me in its glow but I paid no attention to it I instead picked up the helpless alarm and held it above my head then repetitiously smashed it against the floor the noise became more of a satanic groan, then .. silence.

I held the remaining pieces in my hands breathing heavy around my tousled hair that was surrounding my face, I slouched back and turned my head slowly towards the door where I saw Fang, Gazzy and Angel they all looked shocked in their own way then Fang leaned over his siblings and whispered "I wonder if shes looking for her next victim." they both took off like a bullet down the hallway even when they were out of sight I heard their feet pounding against the floor trying to put as much distance between themselves and morning me as possible.

"Morning sleeping beauty" chuckled Fang and he gave me a half smirk but I was to exhausted to appreciate it fully so I grunted and crawled on all fours back to my bed and flopped down not caring if I was late for the first day of school that's the point its the first day you can say you got lost or something and everyone would believe you. All of a sudden I was forcefully lifted out of bed and flung over Fangs shoulder he carried me to the bathroom with me kicking and screaming the whole way "You put me down this INSTANT!" "Sure thing princess" and he dropped me in the tub with my legs sticking over the side then turned on the shower to frigid cold.

I heard laughter from the door and knew the kids came back but I was trying to win a war I was waging with myself and I took everything in my power to not grab my head and scream rocking back and forth but instead I went rigid and grabbed the sides of the tub for support as the water blasted on the top of my head I was just trying to breath but the flashbacks were hitting me in waves mercilessly pulling me under until breathing normal wasn't an option, fighting it wasn't an option and my sanity was taking a brutal beating just trying to keep my mental walls up.

"Max?" I heard faintly once the laughter died down then a more paniced "Max?!" but the flashback had won and I couldn't hear anything else but my father screaming at me _"You worthless trash you think you can just take without permission! Everything in this house costs money do you have any money to pay for what you took from me?" I stood there shaking I looked to my left and saw a mirror, the mirror reflected me 8 years old silent tears streaming down my face I knew he hated me but I hadn't learned how to not care yet, how to accept that it's ok that he hates me, how it's ok that I hate me._

 _He punched the left side of my face and I fell to the floor but I refused to cry out, the only one here was Ari and he learned to not interfere long ago but he at least comforted me when daddy was done, he tucked my hair behind my ears and held me telling me everything would be ok one day. I just had to wait but one day, my escape would come he said over and over how we would live in a beautiful house and we would have a waiter just to bring us chocolate pudding._

 _Daddy then grabbed me by the hair and lifted me to my feet "I asked you a question!" I struggled to make my voice not quiver "I'm sorry I was thirsty and thought it would be ok if I had just a little." I whispered as I avoided eye contact "If you'r so damn thirsty you can have water!" he bellowed at me his face just a couple inches away from mine then he plunged me forward into the bathtub that had been pre-filled with water for this very purpose, he had planned this punishment, thought about how exactly he could cause me pain that would bring him the most pleasure._

 _My head broke the calm water surface diving beneath where I flailed with all my might trying to grab the side of the tub to pull me up but it was no use I would get to breath when he decided I could breath, that's how everything in this house went._

 _My strength was leaving me and the tiny dots in front of my eyes were getting bigger and bigger ready to engulf me entirely to pull me into the black nothingness but my daddy decided to be gracious and pulled me up._

 _I gulped in air trying to fill my lung with as much as they could hold just in case he dunked me under again but instead he sat me on the edge of the toilet and placed his hands on either side of my face he looked me straight in the eyes daring me to look away but I held them trying to show nothing that I was feeling._

 _"You understand that I had to do that right?" he asked me all traces of anger left his voice he didn't show love or sympathy but an emptiness that felt like I was the equivalent of a dog that misbehaved._

 _"Yes daddy, I understand." I replied making my voice void of all emotions like his "That's my girl, now hug me goodnight and say thank you for this lesson." tears filled my eyes as my arms reached around his shoulders my hands barley touched behind him "Thank you daddy, for my lesson." I choked out as I left I saw Ari standing by the door with a towel meaning he saw everything, he wrapped me up tightly and whispered how everything would be ok, like always just perfectly ... ok._

I was coming back out of the flashback when I heard voices screaming Ari's name then the water stopped but I didn't move I focused on the wall right in front of me repeating to myself like a mantra over and over I'm ok now, I'm ok now but I felt myself just saying it but never believing it, if I believed it then I wouldn't be prepared when my world came crashing down and if Ari leaves me again and I'll be all alone and ... I suddenly saw Ari kneel in the tub in between my legs in front of me and grab the back of my drenched head and pull me into his chest whispering like he use to.

"It'll be ok Maxie. You're not there anymore, I got you it's ok. Someone get me a towel." he whispered forcefully I felt the towels scratchy fabric drape over my head as he continued to hold me into him I suddenly started to hear everything that wasn't him, all the whispers. "She ok?" "What happened?" then Lissa walked in "Come on babe I'm gonna be late, we need to get going if your gonna give me a ride." I felt Ari stiffen then stopped holding me, he pushed me back just enough to look into my eyes "You ok?" he looked like he actually cared for a second until the she witch spoke again "Come on does she freak out every time she has a shower? You know what I'll be waiting in the car, I don't have time for this."

Then she turned on her heels walking away leaving the bathroom in silence then Ari deeply sighed he tugged the towel around me a little tighter and tousled my hair like you would at a child's baseball game or something "You'll be ok, come on you'll be late for school." he gave me a sympathetic smile and left without looking back I still felt eyes on me, eyes judging and watching but never doing anything.

"Please leave." I barely choked out in a whisper refusing to look at them as tears filled my eyes but I refused to let them fall, I'm not that weak little girl anymore I stared down at the drain of the tub hearing shuffling feet scurrying to leave "Hey Max?" I heard Fang whisper nervously at the door way being the last to leave "I'm really and I mean really sorry, I didn't know." I continued to stare at the drain in front of me "You ok?" he finally whispered after a good minute. I tore my eyes away from the drain slowly turning my head up to look him directly in the eyes "I'm fine." I breathed out as a single tear escaped trailing down my face I turned to stare at the drain again until I heard the door click shut.

As soon as the click echoed around the small room I pulled the towel off me and molded in into a ball, smothering my face into it a sob broke though followed by several more but I made sure they were unheard, unnoticed, like me.

I got out of the tub and rummaged under the sink until I found where I stored my old blade from the other night, sliding it across my skin four time I finally got my breathing under control, I washed my face and stuck my blade back where it was inconspicuous to anyone who didn't know where to look.

I emerged from the bathroom only to walk six feet to my room and shut the door again, I threw on my hoodie and jeans I pulled my hair into a ponytail taking a calming breath I grabbed my backpack and walked to the front door to find no one there, figures. Walking outside I saw a junkie car sitting in our driveway upon closer inspection I saw the rest of the band in their waiting for me I was startled, I didn't mean to make them all late.

"We goin today?" screamed Nudge from the back seat I smirked at her as I got my ass in gear and got in the car, the drive took about seven minutes but everyone was having their own conversations among one another except me, and Fang but I assume he doesn't do small talk so we stayed quite while everyone talked around us, I was just happy no one wanted to bring up what happened this morning, just move on and forget, that's how I like it.

We pulled into school and everyone stuck together as a group until we got to the office then I realized they already had their schedules and were once again just waiting on me as soon as I got my schedule though it was ripped out of my hands and passed around from person to person as they all exclaimed excitedly who got to which class with me I smirked as I got a warm feeling in my stomach that just maybe this year won't be so bad, just maybe.

School was long and uneventful and before I knew it we were all piling out of Fangs car racing to get inside first everyone piled in the kitchen grabbing whatever junk food they could find before filing into the basement to start practice, they invited me to watch but I declined saying that my teachers were lame and gave me homework on the first day but truthfully i didn't want to be around Lissa or Ari for that matter just yet.

I slide in my room quietly turning on my Ipod I kicked off my shoes and stuck my ear buds in, I laid on my stomach listening to lyrics swim through my mind and melodies speak directly to me describe my life more perfect then I ever could. I was just in the middle of a Halsey song when I felt a slight draft I shivered slightly but thought nothing of in until a giant meaty hand wrapped itself around my mouth clamping on to my checks violently letting his fingers make bruises around my lips then I heard a voice I had hoped I had escaped permanently whisper harshly into my ear as he ripped out my earbuds and threw them across the room but my Ipod unplugged and went the oposite direction landing by the door I tried screaming with all I had flailing to try and at least make a noise to signal anyone that I needed help, if not then at least to try and fight back, to never go into that hell again.

"Hello Maxie, ready to come home?" and with that single sentence I recognized my dad's voice I was trying to fight back with everything I had but once he got me to the window I saw two other men standing there ready to grab me.

As he shoved me out the window I found my opportunity and screamed like my life depended on it, hell it just might. Even I knew though as I heard the drums from the basement pounding through the walls and the guitar solo slicing through the silence of the night, I knew no one would hear me.


	5. Chapter 5

I was dragged flailing wildly to Jeb's broken down car he parked in the yard only 20 feet from my window, I hated myself for not noticing but now was not the time for reflecting on what I could have done better, I needed to escape.

I swung my elbow back hard knocking the wind out of whoever had me from behind I didn't recognize any of them as old buddies so they had to be new acquaintances.

His breath left him in a whoosh but as I pivoted on my heal I ran into a tall burly chest I looked up and saw the face of a scraggly Russian smiling evilly down at me he wrapped his arms around my arms and waist squeezing hard enough that breaths came to me in short strangled gasps he proceeded to lift me off the ground in this position and carry me to the car like my struggling was nothing to concern him like a child throwing a tantrum in the middle of Walmart and I was just an annoying pest at this point who needed to be dealt with privately.

He sat in the back seat not adjusting his hold at all he sat me on his lap I stopped my squirming and froze when i felt his little friend popping up to say hello beneath me I was at a loss what to do I felt completely useless nothing I did mattered I will never give up and stop fighting but it felt like my attempts at escape were just a laughing matter to them that they could easily excuse as nothing to be worried about.

The Russians tightened his hold even more like a python around his prey just waiting for me to accept the inevitability that I was weaker then him he nuzzled into my hair and took a deep breath in then let out a deep loan moan I felt his body react as his bulge grew firmer making my spot increasingly uncomfortable.

I wanted to scream at my father if he knew what kind of thoughts were going through my captures mind, if this was some sick punishment that I would be forced to endure but I held my tongue because I knew it wouldn't matter what I said to him, he would always find a way to hurt me, but I refused to participate in his sick game I. Will. Escape. I just need to find my window of opportunity.

I recognized my personal hell when we pulled up, I wanted to cry out in frustration and pain filled sorrow I had tried so damn hard to leave but now I was being drug back, hell would not release its greatest prisoner.

The engine stopped and I felt like time speed up and everything was happening so fast blurring past me until I was suddenly standing in front of the door panic filled every crevice of my mind lighting up every muscle in my body demanding action, I firmly placed a foot on either side of the door frame pushing with my whole body back into this brute of a man making him stop in his tracks and laugh deeply.

"Little mouse thinks she's smart." he walked away from the door and turned us both around so he walked in backwards and my efforts were for nothing I watched as the door frame passed me and the familiar smell of alcohol and piss hit me making me want to gag.

I was dropped with a sudden plop in the middle of the living room and the two men and my father surrounded me I looked up at them my eyes full of hatred and determination showing them I will not be bullied into submission.

My father was the first to step forward with one fluid motion he ripped off his belt I was confused until he held it at the end and reeling his hand back he swung the buckle end of the belt at me letting it lash me across my face splitting the skin apart at the corner of my mouth opening my cheek like the Joker had just made me smile on one side I flinched slightly but continued to glare he reeled back again but this time I was ready and caught it in my bare hand feeling the middle prong dig into my palm but then I pulled back ripping it out of his grasp.

I rolled to my knees and sprung onto the balls of my feet and lashed out with the leather end slashing at my cold hearted father mercilessly I roared with pent up rage I got in two good hits before he lunged at me knocking me backwards he knelt over me placing a knee on either side of my chest he punched me faster then I could respond or register which fist to block before the next was already coming at my face I took over three fourths of the blows and clumsily blocked the rest.

He was breathing hard by the time he stopped he looked up at the ceiling breathing unevenly then he slowly got up and walked leisurely to the far wall I refused to take my eyes off him as he reached behind the corner table pushed against the wall and pulled out a wooden bat I started to scramble backwards searching frantically for a weapon to use myself but as he advanced towards me I was coming up empty handed his first swing caught me in the shoulder his next three swings hit the same mark until I felt a sicking pop as my shoulder popped out of place.

Lucky for me (insert eye roll here) he switched to my stomach smashing into it like it was a pinata and he was dying for candy. I rolled on my stomach to stop the pain but the blows didn't lessen as he pounded on my back a trickle of blood steadily poured out of my mouth collecting in a puddle underneath me as if to say maybe by the time I bleed out there will be a river to carry my body away from here finally so I can rest in peace.

Finally after what felt like an eternity the pounding stopped and my body sunk into the floor into a useless mass I screamed at myself mentally don't lay here don't accept defeat get up just please get up but beside my one useless arm laid the other that refused to listen to my pleading, it instead barely twitched my pointer finger.

"Think she ready now? No more resistance?" spoke the Russian slurring as he spoke indicating he was already intoxicated but it didn't show in his stance or how he walked, other then his speech he looked like a functioning adult. "Yeah this will get me through the month right?" said my father nervously as he clasped his bottle in his hand shakily, from nervousness or exhaustion I didn't know, the Russian grunted approvingly as a reply indicating his agreement.

I was grabbed roughly by my shoulder and dragged to the end of hallway and up the stairs he stomped assertively each step echoing footsteps throughout the house after we reached the top he walked to my fathers room walking in he tossed me carelessly on the bed looking around the pitch black room I let out a slight sob trying to hold back the rest from following but the feeling of uselessness covered me like a blanket telling me that I should just let my body become numb and I should block out any feelings, not allow anything to hurt me anymore for tonight but I find it harder and harder to come back from being numb.

It becomes so hard to care about anything or smile or even get out of bed in the morning ... to not cut deeper and deeper and let the numbness become a permanent side effect of this tragedy I call life.

His body lingers at the foot of the bed as he stares at me he starts to pull of his clothes I try not to think about what I know will come next, to put it bluntly as possible I was about to pay my fathers rent ... again.

His hands clumsily undid the button of my jeans and in one fluid motion they were off his eyes racked over me and I squirmed as much as my body would allow he bent his body crouching over me like a predator. He touched the tip of his nose on my knee and slowly crawled up letting it trace up my thigh and continuing past my underwear he kept going pushing my sweater up with the top of his head it rose up until it stopped as he did once he reached the pointed peaks of my breasts his face lingered there as his hands finished the job removing my sweater.

His hands then gently danced to the back of my bra and unclasped it in one fluid motion wasting no time stumbling around, he was experienced another sob broke through my lips. I couldn't stand that he was doing everything so gently as if he cared about me, as if this was making love not rape.

He smirked at me as if reading my mind "Do not worry, I like it rough once I start fuck." like that was suppose to sooth me I turned my head looking at anything but what was in front of me his tongue danced around my nipple teasing it then he put the whole thing in his mouth sucking on it then released it with a pop he blew on it, the sudden chill making it harden against my will at this point tears were flowing non stop but I held back the sobs choking them down banishing them back into the darkest parts of me.

"Fine you don't like good time? We go straight to fucking then!" he sounded pleased as he wrapped his hand behind my back and picked me up crawling on all fours he reached the headboard and laid my back against it sitting me straight up he positioned himself right in front of me I made the mistake of looking down and saw his full length already hard and ready to perform, and he was not a small man I gulped trying to unsee how big he was but I was already hyperventilating in anticipation for this to be over knowing the pain that would follow.

He plunged into me in one motion not giving me time to adjust to him I let out a small whimper but he was already pulling in and out at such a speed that I couldn't hold back my cries of pain he had a glint in his eye telling me he enjoyed me crying out I may of well been moaning in pleasure for all he cared then getting a boost of need he grabbed the back of the headboard and used it to pull him into me harder and faster then before I couldn't quite them anymore my cries became screams of agony pleading for him to stop but it just fueled him more he scooped his hands under my ass and picked me up as he stood up but never stopping his brutal thrusting he used gravity to help him it felt like he was picking me up off him and would drop me letting me fall fully around his full length every thrust.

His speed was getting more needy and I knew he was reaching his end as he released inside of me I felt myself convulse involuntarily as he pulled himself out of me he dropped me on the bed like a used whore that has served her purpose he grabbed his clothes, dressing in record time he slipped out the door I let myself drown in my self pity I sobbed uncontrollably into the stained sheets I hated what he did but I hated how I did nothing to stop it even more, I just took it over and over I just ... take it.

I felt that familiar numb feeling start to circle around me threatening to consume me and once I felt completely and utterly alone that would be when it would leave me to sit in the dark with the deafening silence surrounding me reminding me constantly just how alone I am but just as I was considering just letting it take me I remembered Angel hugging me, and I remembered .. Fang .. smiling at me.

I dried my eyes as best as I could when in reality I probably just shifted the tears around on my face and looked around for my clothes my sweater was just an arms length away above me still sitting discarded on the bed I took a shaky breath in and told myself I would make it out of here again, I had the sudden thought slap me across the face, what if I never saw that smile again, I don't know why it was so important to me but at least it was something to hang onto to chase the shadows away for now.

Using this new found clarity I pushed my violently shaking hand up and used two fingers to grasp my sweater and pull it down to me I let out another sob slipping it over me I pushed myself off the bed where I found my pants and it took me a good five minutes to get them on but I was so very damn proud of what I had already done but I couldn't stop here not when I had come so far, I know I only got dressed but that was the biggest mountain I have climbed in a long time when every step forward felt like hands were around my ankles pulling me back.

I crawled to the bottom of the window and almost lost my nerve looking up at it but slowly I pulled myself up with only my one arm and minimal effort coming from my left leg I got my head and my good arm dangling uselessly out the window I stopped to try and breath which was now coming out in short, ragged, harsh spurts but I let out yet another sob when I saw Fangs car silently pull up the house and everyone frantically whisper shouting on not wanting to stay in the car when Fang and Ari stepped out but then I saw Lissa's hand spring forward and grab Ari pleading with him not to go and leave her unprotected but then I caught Fang's eyes and he sprinted towards the window he whispered up to me "Hey kiddo you gave everyone a damn heart attack." he tried joking to lighten the mood but I saw in his eyes his nerves were fried.

I let out a choked sob in response and I hated myself for crying in front of him but my mental wall had taken a beating and I couldn't put it back up my emotions were all coming forward to hard to stop them his face darkened and his eyes became hard almost terrifying "Jump, I'll catch you." tears were streaming down my face again as I choked out "I can't"

"I promise I'll catch you." he tried smirking playfully but his eyes remanded hard, I had taken to much time sitting here and all my energy had depleted again.

"No I mean I can't .. I can't move" I whispered so softly I thought he didn't hear me but the look of rage in his eyes said he had heard me perfectly fine then suddenly I was ripped backwards by a hand grabbing my bad shoulder I screamed out in pain and finally letting myself feel terror I started shaking uncontrollably as I looked up into the cold eyes of the second member my father brought with him "Your not getting away before my turn you little shit, you'll pay me what I'm due!" through all my fear I still found the minuscule courage to spit in his face he snarled at me and raised his fist back to swing at my face like it wasn't pulverized enough but as I closed my eyes and waited for the pain to come I was surprised when I felt nothing I opened my eyes to see the strangers fist in Fangs hand an inch from making impact with my face.

Then I looked at Fang's face but his full attention was on the man in front of him as the shadows played across his face he looked like he was the true angle of death and the shadows were his home, it was terrifying to witness but to be on the receiving end must be soul crushing.

 **Disclaimer**


	6. Chapter 6

**Fang Pov**

The band was wrapping another rehearsal up after playing each song three times minimum because something or another would set Lissa off and we would have to redo the song from the beginning to get it and I quote "Just fantastically perfect".

I made sure Angel and Gazzy were cleaning up the small mountain of trash they made while we were here, as soon as they finished we started walking upstairs Angel stopped at the top and spun around to face me "I need to say night to Max." she turned and sprinted down the hall before I could reply, not that I would say no anyway.

I shoved Gazzy along to go say goodnight as well but when we got to her room we found her room empty but everything about this scene was wrong, Max's shoes were by the door still and her IPod was tossed on the floor like it wasn't her most prized possession and her earbuds were on the opposite side of the room but the thing that caught my eye the most was the window wide open.

I walked to the window in two large strides sticking my head out the light pouring out from the window silhouetting me in the shadows was the only light I had, but it was all I needed to see the tire tracks.

"ARI" I bellowed refusing to leave the room where I last saw Max safe. Ari came charging up the stairs he knew it was serious if I had to yell but I still heard Lissa grumbling about everyone being needy and she needed time with her boyfriend but I choose to ignore her.

Ari slammed his shoulder into Max's door frame to stop himself abruptly he looked at me then around the room assessing everything I had already see then walked to the window and looked my in the eyes then slowly out the window once his eyes settled on the tire tracks realization and anger crossed his face.

"We need to go get her .. but .." I snapped my head to look at him feeling my emotionless mask wavering "What the hell do you mean but!"

"I know it was my dad but bro you don't know my dad he can kick our ass if we even try to break in and get her we don't stand a chance against him and he no doubt has friends helping look at the footprints in the dirt there is one big motherfucker helping him." I grabbed the front of his collar and slammed his back against the window seal he looked taken aback.

"That is your sister who got drug away to that hell your so scared of and you don't even have the balls to help her escape, she came to you for help and your just gonna leave her there by herself?! You spineless coward!" I spat out the last part and dropped him I spun on my heal and ran towards my car muttering cures under my breath wondering how long had it taken us to notice.

I was fumbling for my car keys, finding the correct one I jammed it into the door yanking it open I sank into the leather seat then heard the back door squeak open and feet shuffling into the back seat I put my arm around the passenger seat to swing around and see who was sneaking in. My eyes meet with Angels determined blue ones "Were helping get Max." it wasn't a question but what if the house really was dangerous would I be driving them straight into something that could haunt their nightmares forever.

I took in a deep breath to tell them to get out and wait for me here but next came in Nudge followed by Iggy and Gazzy "Times a wasten lets get a move on." spoke up Nudge matching Angels determined look I sighed in defeat "Fine but no one leaves this car got it?" I gave them my no bullshit glare and they all nodded solemnly I grunted "Good" and turned back around turning on the ignition the passenger side door swung open and Ari jumped in with a pouting Lissa on his lap he refused to look at me but at least he got his head on straight and got in the car.

I floored the petal letting Ari give me turn by turn directions I turned on the last street and felt Ari go stiff next to me spotting the house ominously at the end of the street speeding up to us I parked in front before the arguing came that everyone wanted to help Max but I turned to them feeling myself overflowing with a need to get to Max as quickly as possible my mind racing with all the possible ways I could find her .. if she would be in the middle of a pool of her own blood staring with dead eyes at the ceiling mouth half open but no longer taking in breath.

I looked at everyone in the back seat and they all went silent as my eyes begged them to stop arguing so I can get to her sooner I sent them a grateful look before looking at the house trying to find an entrance where we could sneak in but then I saw a patch of dirty blonde sticking out the side window I breathed out in relief and felt my heart lurch forward and my body followed as my feet raced towards the window I tried to make my face impassive again I looked up at her and took in all the damage.

I better say something but not something dumb like are you ok because obviously shes not but not uncaring and cold or distant no I need something cool but thoughtful oh God now I'm not saying anything and I look like I'm just staring at her super creepily come on man just open your mouth and say something "Hey kiddo you gave everyone a damn heart attack." fucking smooth you retard I was mentally bashing my head against a wall until I saw her first tear fall followed by a small sob I could see in her eyes she was ashamed of herself for crying but it was the most heart breaking sound I have ever heard my walls went from sturdy to crumbling uncontrollably with every tear I counted falling off her face.

"Jump I'll catch you." I ground out trying to contain my rage that was flowing through my veins like a drug fueling my muscles priming them for action demanding I make someone pay for what they did to her. "I can't." she choked out I bite my inner lip so hard blood started to pool in my mouth but I tried smirking at her to reassure her "I promise I'll catch you."

"No I mean I can't .. I can't move." she whispered so softly I almost lost it in the wind but the second the words hit me my wall shattered unleashing all my emotions of rage, allowing them to go wild running rampant through my mind destroying all happiness and light keeping me from being swallowed by the darkness in me.

I saw her scream out in pain as she was harshly thrown back into the room she was trying to escape I let my anger control my movement I didn't think just acted I lunged at the window I felt my fingers grasp the window seal I pushed myself up with my feet braced against the house I crawled through the window and saw a weaselly looking man about to punch Max's face I lurched forward just in time to take his fist in my hand I stopped his swing and let him realize his fight just got bigger then a little girl in the fetal position on the floor his eyes grew large and he stumbled backwards.

"Hey man I don't know who you are but I got no beef with you." he stuttered backing up into the wall but every step he took I took one towards him, his back hit the wall leaving him no where else to go so once his fight or flight finally kicked in he decided to grow a spine and fight back he threw a punch that I easily dodged I returned it aimed right at his stomach I hit my mark hard he gasped for breath doubling over I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back up right and aimed another punch right for his throat he went down gasping I turned and grabbed Max bridal style finally looking away from that bastard before I hit him again.

I swung both legs out the window and jumped trying to hold Max as still as possible to prevent causing her any more unnecessary pain but once I hit the ground she let out a tiny whimper I held her tighter and whispered soothingly to her apologizing for not being there sooner.

 **Max Pov**

Fang picked me up and jumped from the window a tiny whimper escaped past my lips I was humiliated even further more then already being carried but then Fang held me snugly to his chest and suddenly maybe this wasn't so bad I curled my fingers in his shirt and inhaled deeply he smelt like hot fresh tea it was soothing and sweet smelling which was strange but .. nice.

"I'm so sorry it took so long." he whispered I looked up into his eyes and saw he was swimming in self hatred I looked up at him and realized if he hadn't been there tonight I would have been made to endure another man before the night was over "Thank you, so much I mean .. thank you ... you don't know how much you just helped me, no ones ever done anything before they just let it happen and look away." I started rambling attempting to say what I meant but he looked relieved so mission accomplished I turned red and turned into his chest to hide again until we reached the car and everyone started shooting questions at once.

"Are you ok?" "What happened?" "How long ago did he take you?" "What did he do?" I refused to look at anyone or answer any questions I just hide in Fangs chest and murmured "Just take me home." he nodded and looked at Iggy "Can you hold her while I drive?" as he saw there was no room left for me to sit I rolled my eyes "Or I could sit all by my lonesome and Angel could sit on his lap." I said adding a dash of humor to my voice Fangs face got a small shade redder at the obvious solution to our problem then he nodded to Angel to move she did with a small smile Fang put me down and I finally stifled a whimper successfully.

Fang drove us all home the whole way Ari kept demanding that he take me to the hospital but I kept turning on my hardest glare and turned my tone to ice telling him no, then went back to ignoring him as I kept replaying the scene over and over in my head where he stayed with Lissa and left me like a bad movie you can't get out of your head but it just replayed the worst part over and over but what hurt was that I considered that to be one of the worst parts of my night was him leaving me because he couldn't leave his girlfriend in the damn car all by her damn self.

I was still seething internally when we got back to Ari's house but on the outside I looked calm and exhausted and probably like a bloody mess. Fang came to my door to pick me up again but I waved him off "I need to lean on you if that's ok but let me keep at least some of my dignity." he rolled his eyes "Your dignities fine." but he let me lean on him and walked with me slowly step by step staying right by me I got through the front door and we started for my room before Ari started bugging yet again that I go to a hospital I pushed Fang to just keep going and ignore him but he just followed "Oh my God would you shut up already?!" I screamed at him as I continued to hobble away.

"Your arm is busted and your face is still bleeding from that massive cut across about half your damn face so no I will NOT shut up and go away!" I ripped away from Fang and narrowed my eyes to the wall in front of me I took two large swift steps forward angling my body I hit my bad shoulder against the wall with as much force as I could muster but it was just enough force, I bit down on my lip once I heard the pop and the searing pain followed but it almost immediately ebbed away in comparison to how much everything else hurt I shakily tried getting back into a standing position but thankfully not everyone wanted to watch me struggle through that Fang found a spot right next to my side again I leaned on him heavily but he didn't say anything.

I looked behind me at Ari panting heavily I spat at him "Problem solved, anything else?" His jaw open and closed a couple times before he mumbled "Fix your cheek yet." before he turned away and and went down to the basement with Lissa close on his heels I felt that familiar loneliness settle down around me, the lights seemed to get dimmer and the music sadder but I turned back towards my room reaching my bed Fang helped me down gently "Need help cleaning off a bit before bed?" I shook my head no before laying down and waited to hear the door shut as soon as it clicked behind him I positioned myself so I was propped up against the wall and piled all pillows and blankets around me for comfort like a child curling my knees into my chest I tucked them under my sweater as well so I was balled up and I stared at the window across from me.

I couldn't fall asleep I instead kept my eyes on that window for about an hour waiting for something to move outside for a shadow to start running towards me and animal noises started to sound more like hushed whispers being exchanged plotting on how to get in.

Suddenly there was a soft knock at my door but I couldn't tear my gaze away from the window until I felt the bed move by me my eyes slowly looked away to find Angel looking at me with a sad expression then I looked behind her and in the doorway I saw Gazzy and Fang but I choose to look back down at her.

"Fang said we could stay the night and I really wanted to sleep in your room is that ok?" A slow smile spread across my face "Yeah" I nodded she scooted next to me and Gazzy ran over and slept next to her so I was between the wall and Angel while she laid in between me and Gazzy I tossed them each a blanket and pillow smiling at them then I looked back up at Fang and mouthed a thank you because I knew it was his idea he smirked at me and nodded a your welcome "You staying as well?" I whispered at him he nodded again and pointed at my last spare blanket and pillow I tossed them at him he caught them with accuracy I started looking for a comfortable spot for him to sleep when he dropped the pillow right underneath the window and plopped down covering himself with the blanket.

I watched him as his breathing evened out and the kids started snoring next to me and maybe it was just me but the darkness lifted a little bit and the room got a little brighter.-

 **Disclaimer**


	7. Chapter 7

I had a restful sleep when I woke I was met with a bundle of disheveled blonde hair in my face but it smelt like strawberries and daisies so I took in a deep breath reveling in the innocence of the smell.

I scooted slowly to the foot of the bed to not disturb the peaceful sleep of the others I got to the end of the bed and saw Fang drooling on his pillow with every piece of his hair going a different direction I couldn't look away from how peaceful his face looked like he didn't have a life time of burdens to take care of every single day of his life.

I couldn't help myself before I knew it I extended my hand and gently brushed some of his hair out of his face giving me an opening to see how dark and full his eyelashes were laying against his pale face I let my eyes wander down to his lips tracing the curves where they pull up in a smile with my finger tips dancing across his skin I felt a pressure in my chest and my breath hitched in my throat.

I stood up and shook my head to clear my mind I forced myself to look away and walk to the corner of my room where I had seen a dollar store needle and thread kit just the other day, finding it I carried it with me to the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror I grimaced at what I saw.

I made myself just focus on the gash across my face with shaking hands I threaded the needle and held it against me cheek but I had to pep talk myself before I could press the metal through my skin, pulling the thread almost all the way through before I had to loop back and thread through again and again I was almost done and pushing bile down forcing myself to just focus and do two more stitches and I would be done I squeezed my eyes shut leaning against the counter breathing heavily but so far proud of myself for the lack of noise I was making.

I finished the last stitches with the black thread holding me together I dabbed what little anti bacterial cream I could find around the bathroom on it and jumped in the shower letting it relax all my muscles and caress my skin tenderly until all the hot water was gone and I don't mean it was running low, no I mean gone.

I stepped out of the shower, dried myself leaving my hair down to frame my face I stepped out of the bathroom and found a folded up black sweater and baggy grey sweatpants by the door I smiled and grabbed them slinking back in the bathroom I pulled them on and smirked at my appearance I looked like I had picked out these clothes myself, running a brush through my hair I braided it off to the side and let it hang down in front of me.

I left the bathroom for good this time and walked back to my room and found only Angel in the room still rubbing sleep out of her eyes she smiled up at me but faltered when she saw my cheek she kneeled on the edge of the bed and held me by the chin inspecting my handy work she nodded in approval and let me go.

"So let me guess you found those clothes outside the bathroom for you?" I gave her a confused look but nodded she smiled sadly

"It was from Fang he always tries to help with the little things but he can't handle being in a room with blood or he freaks out." my eyes grew large then I smiled at the thought of him picking out my clothes and setting them out for me.

"Yesterday was the one of the few times he actually charged into a room with blood in it without having a panic attack." I didn't know how to react to this information so I decided to change the topic instead.

"Hey angel I was curious if me you and Nudge wanted to have a all girls shopping day I need some things and haven't used any of my fight money yet?" her face lit up "You mean .. a girls day without Lissa?" I let my smile take up half my face this time "Obviously." she squealed jumping from the bed "I'm gonna see if Nudge is here yet!" and sprinted from the room with excitement.

I smiled grabbing my shoes and walking to the kitchen I looked at the almost empty cupboards and rolled my eyes at how little my brother actually does to keep up his house. He literally just pays his rent and calls it good, oh well I thought shrugging my shoulders I turned around and almost ran into Fang I jumped about a foot in the air startled at not hearing him come into the room I scowled at him but them my face softened.

"Thanks for the clothes." I mumbled not good at this whole appreciate other people thing. He smirked at me but his eyes went to my cheek I turned my head down to look at the ground and hide my face from him I side stepped around him to leave this awkward situation but he caught my arm and out of habit my body went rigid and he almost immediately released me "I'm sorry I just ... do you need a ride?" I was thrown off by his question and the sudden change of topic so I didn't know how to respond but he jumped in first.

"I mean girls day out .. do you girls need a ride for girls day out?" his face was turning red and he was glaring at the microwave across the room muttering to himself I smirked at him "That would be nice, thanks." he nodded but kept staring at the microwave until we heard a long high pitched squeal come from the basement and both girls came bounding upstairs two stairs at a time Nudge grabbed my shoulders and beamed up at me "Shopping!" she screamed like I wasn't aware of the plans but I just smiled at her and nodded.

Fang gave us a ride to the mall and asked what time to be back to pick us up and I told him give us about an hour but Nudge demanded two he nodded then speed off leaving me to fend for myself but I did ask for this so I just endured it the best I could Nudge tried to help me pick out clothes but I told her it had to be long sleeves and no shorts she whined until I told her it would show my scars she grew solemn and dropped it so picking out a few outfits we walked over to the grocery store portion of the mall and shopped for the best stuff for teenagers to eat on the go with minimal cooking.

"Iggy can cook you know." Nudge spoke up "Actually really well." my eyebrows rose you mean he can cook and I have been living off pop tarts "Screw this were grabbing ingredients for spaghetti!" there were cheers of agreement from the girls we got done shopping early but just sat around talking until Fang pulled up he gave me a confused look "You used the money you earned for food? No shoes or purses or something?" I squinted my eyes at him "You really don't know me do you? You think high heals and a purse would match my sweatpants and sweater?" he chuckled deeply but drove us home.

It took five trips back and forth to get all the groceries in the house I arranged everything where it should be and Iggy walked in with Gazzy on his heals "Holy sweet baby Jesus FOOD!" squealed Iggy like a child on Christmas I giggled at his reaction "I have been hearing about your apparently impressive culinary skills and demand spaghetti to judge myself." I told him putting my hands on my hips daring him to deny me but he just sprinted to the fridge pulling out everything he would need "Everyone out master at work!" he barked at everyone we all got out of his way and scattered into our own areas until diner was ready.

I devoured three heaping plates before I considered myself satisfied burping loudly I thanked Iggy for the meal "Hey you get the goods and I'll cook ya anything." he said cockily winking at me I just rolled my eyes then Angel slammed her fists on the table "Lets play Truth or Dare!" startling everyone by the outburst but first Nudge agreed then Gazzy followed by Iggy then Angel said she was gonna get Ari and Lissa and she was running to the basement before we could tell her no but me and Fang looked at each other being the only ones to not agree yet we both slowly pushed away from the table and slipped away silently unnoticed until we reached the kitchen and Angel burst through the entrance glaring at us both.

"Where do thing you guys are going?" she demanded defiantly putting her hands on her hips and stomping her foot we both exchanged glances deciding on who wanted to tell her we didn't want to participate but when we looked back at her face she looked on the verge of tears being barely held back by her giant blue eyes being amplified to there fullest ability we tried to look away but it was to late the Bambi eyes had taken there effect on us and we were putty in her hands and she knew it.

"Fine" we both mumbled simultaneously shuffling back into the living room where everyone was sitting on the ground in a circle leaving two spots open for us on opposite side of the circle we both took a spot and plopped down uninterested.

"Omg I'll start ok ok ummm Lissa truth or dare?" spoke up Nudge taking the lead when no one else would "Truth" Lissa said sounding bored "Of course" I snickered she glared at me but I just smiled back "Whats something your scared of?" "spiders" she responded immediately without missing a beat "That's not what I meant, I meant like you biggest fe.." she was cut off by Lissa "You said a fear I gave you one. Now it's my turn Max truth or dare?" she said smiling at me but it had an evil glint but not enough to scare me so I spoke with confidence "Dare" her smile grew wider "Of course."

"I dare you to kiss everyone who isn't dating in this circle." my face grew red she expected me to fail at this, to humiliate myself in front of everyone. On a dare! Not today motherfucker! I rolled up my sleeves getting ready to become the circle whore but I refused to let her win this to just give up and shamefully walk away.

Gazzy panicked looked at Angel "Hey Angel wanna go get ice cream tomorrow?" she nodded enthusiastically "Awesome it's a date now neither of us have to kiss Max!" Lissa rolled her eyes but spit out "Fine but only you two get out for thinking of that but everyone else has to participate." I got on all fours hating myself but told myself, hell no you make a show and make that bitch watch and choke on her own words I crawled towards Nudge slowly making sure to make eye contact as I advanced towards her she was so flustered she couldn't speak straight which is huge for Nudge.

"Y-y-you don't need to do wha- what you don't want do I mean you'r a pretty girl, I mean woman but you don't need to k-k-kiss me I mean I know you don't want to I mean who wouldn't w-w-want to." I put a finger softly to her lips it hurt to know she thought she wasn't kissable but I was just as nervous as her I just wasn't showing it I put my hands softly on either side of her face making her look straight at me "Nudge ... you're beautiful" I whispered then softly pressed my lips to hers she froze but I leaned in harder making it more passionate I crawled closer so that I had to tilt her head straight up and I was directly above her to deepen the kiss she started to kiss back before I slowly licked her bottom lip begging for entrance she hesitated then let me in she parted her lips so my tongue could explore the fullest depths of her mouth I pulled away slowly she leaned forward almost begging for more a long spit line still connected our lips I pushed my thumb against her bottom lip and caressed it then put my thumb in my mouth to lick off our saliva still looking her in the eyes.

Her eyes had a far off look to them then they snapped back to reality and she cleared her throat a dozen times turning red as a tomato and staring at the floor intently I giggled looking at her let me get this straight I am not gay but the passion I got from that kiss was comforting it felt like a hug from a mother I never had it wasn't world defying but it was .. nice.

I then turned just my head towards Iggy still smirking I tilted my head slightly to the left licked my lips slowly and started slowly crawling towards him he looked worse then Nudge which I was surprised since hes the sexist man whore of the group looks like hes all talk I got closer and he was looking at everyone else but me "Heh that was ... some action I mean I might need a minute just to process everything I just witnessed and burn it in my memory .. forever heh am I right guys?" he asked looking nervously at all the guys in the room "Iggy hands remain at your side." growled Ari

I reached up for his face just like I had previously nudge and wound my fingers through his hair I smiled at him before I roughly tightened my fingers in his hair and yanked sideways to plant a delicate peck on his check.

The room went silent then erupted in laughter that Nudge got all the action but Iggy got none now his face turned red but he looked grateful then I looked down at my last victim "I don't know what your laughing about your up next." I spoke seductively letting the words roll off my tongue as if someone else was speaking, these words were not my own but I snuck a single glance at Lissa and the level of pissed she looked told me I had won I looked back at Fang who had gone back to being stiff as a board but didn't break eye contact every movement towards him he was watching me until I was kneeling right in front of him I gently pushed his bangs out of his face and let my hands continue going back until I had ran my finger half way through his hair I gently tangled and pulled teasing him and his eyes were telling me it was working I slowly leaned down and breathed on his lips softly then kissed him gently, passionately, deeply.

I didn't deepen the kiss as roughly as I had with Nudge I kept it simple but yet beautiful I danced across his lips tangling my fingers in his hair pulling him closer until I felt his hands softly grab my back and press me closer to him we were getting lost in the magic of it all stars were dancing to my favorite songs and fireworks were exploding in my favorite colors and .. I believed in love again.

Then we heard giggling and a deep voice clearing his throat in the background before we pulled apart Fang jerked away and looked at the floor just like everyone else had I felt a stab in my chest like it had personally hurt me more then the others had pulling away but I tried my best to just brush it off and pretend it didn't matter just revel in my victory I told myself but for some reason the victory didn't feel as sweet.

"Anyone else?" I asked Lissa teasingly trying to keep the hurt out of my voice she just scowled and looked at Ari pleadingly "Lets do something else this isn't fun anymore." while pouting he looked at her and smiled adoringly "Of course babe lets go." and just like that they got up and left the house shutting the door behind them without even a wave goodbye.

My feelings started to all become worse and worse from that point on and they were hitting me like a truck everyone pulled away from me no one wanted to kiss me back .. not even Fang, then once again by brother ... my own fricken brother had no problem leaving me again I knew he would be back but it was hurting in my chest so bad.

A horrible feeling gnawing at me digging its way to my center to consume me whole and leave me a corpse that would feel nothing other then loneliness and abandonment. I got up off my knees keeping my eyes to the ground .. just like everyone else had I started shuffling my feet to my bedroom begging mentally for someone to stop me please anyone don't let me hurt me again please anyone .. help.

I got to the bathroom with no one stopping me I turned to shut the door letting my eyes start to pool with tears of all my pent up emotions coming to the surface at once all of them filled with hatred .. for myself. As I grabbed the door to shut it I looked up and for a brief moment my eyes found Fang's he held my gaze for a second before this time I dropped my eyes to floor and gently clicked the door shut.

Going through my ritual I rolled up my pants leg to see my still bruised leg thanks to my father I found my scars like the outlines in a coloring book I made sure to stay inside them only filling in the spaces in between that were getting narrower and narrower I leaned in for my fifth and final cut thinking about how much I had assumed Ari had wanted me but he never wanted me, nobody did and I cut deep into my skin to banish the final thoughts embedded deep within my head.

I rolled my pants leg back down put the razor back, opening the door I slunk into the hallway black spots started to dance in front of my eyes clouding my vision I stumbled next to my door but twisting the door handle at the precise moment I successfully stumbled into my bed room without falling I leaned against the door starting to pant as I steadied my gaze onto my bed I heard a footstep behind me and a deep voice calling out my name "Max?" I didn't have the energy to acknowledge him I tried taking a step forward before the floor moved out from under me and I plunged into the blessed nothingness as darkness overtook me.

 **Disclaimer**


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